How We Got to "The Next Chapter"

It all started with a phone call last summer.  

A friend of mine asked me (Tim -  sometimes I'll be guest posting on Anna's blog throughout the adoption process)  to start a LTG (Life Transformation Group) with him.  An LTG is a spiritual accountability group among guys which includes some intense scripture reading.  Week by week, the same theme kept screaming out at me across the pages of the Bible  - "God cares about his people.  All of them."

Internally, I was conflicted.  I felt like God cared about me and I cared about others, but did I really?  Did my life really reflect that?  Some of my friends would argue yes, but deep down inside I knew it.  I really didn't care much about others.  I cared about my family and friends, but that was about it.

For months, I've listened to God's call of compassion for others in my life.  I knew he was calling me to do something bigger, something so "crazy" that it had to be from God.  (Crazy has been a common word around our house for the past month.  We just keep saying it over and over again.)  

In late April, my assigned reading included the book of Obadiah.  The following verses just hit me like a ton of bricks.

The Lord says to Edom,
   “I will cut you down to size among the nations;
      you will be greatly despised.
 ³ You have been deceived by your own pride
      because you live in a rock fortress
      and make your home high in the mountains.
   ‘Who can ever reach us way up here?’
      you ask boastfully.
 ⁴ But even if you soar as high as eagles
      and build your nest among the stars,
   I will bring you crashing down,”
      says the Lord.....

.....“Because of the violence you did
      to your close relatives in Israel,^{b]" style="font-size: 0.75em; line-height: 0.5em; ">[b]}
   you will be filled with shame
      and destroyed forever.
 ¹¹ When they were invaded,
      you stood aloof, refusing to help them.
   Foreign invaders carried off their wealth
      and cast lots to divide up Jerusalem,
      but you acted like one of Israel’s enemies.

For several days I was constantly thinking to myself, "That's speaking directly to you!  You live in your little fortress and you stand aloof refusing to help others."  At that point, I became consumed with the thought of "How can I help others?  It's time to come out of my fort and do something about it."  But I didn't know how, or where, or when.

One day, while I was driving home, it hit me.  What if we considered adoption?  I knew Anna would never go for it, so I figured it was just some "crazy" thought.  I came home and started asking Anna several questions about the adoption process of our friends, the Dixon's.  Finally fed up with my questions, Anna asked me why I was so curious.  So I just blurted it out...

"What if we adopted?"

And I waited for the laughter.  

The roll of the eyes.

Maybe she would just ignore me.

But instead she said "OK".

"YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO SAY THAT!!!!!!"  was my initial thought.  

(No one ever tells you this when you're dating, but there is nothing more attractive than a woman that loves God.  However, it can also be a little tough, as she's going to listen to the will of God over your own personal selfish desires.)

I immedietly started backing out.  Finding excuses left and right for why we shouldn't adopt.  Finally, we agreed to spend the month of May praying about it.  Day in and day out, God kept providing answers that said "YES, I want you to do this"

There are too many examples to put in this post (which is already too long), but just know this, God speaks in so many ways.  He spoke through people that had no idea we were considering adoption.  He spoke through his Word.  He put more "CRAZY" thoughts in my head than I can count.  And he did the same thing for Anna as well.

When she would doubt... 

I was rock solid.

When I would doubt....

She was rock solid.

And by the end of the month, we were both rock solid.

Finally, here are a couple of specific things we feel God spoke to us during the process

1. This is what I want for you.  Trust me, these are my children and they need to be taken care of.

2. The child needs to look different from you.  What better way to demonstrate God's love to others than to love a child as your own that doesn't look like you.  (Not sure the why on this yet, but I'm going to trust God on that one.)  

3. I'll take care of the finances.  (I still doubt tremendously on this one.  But I do believe that God will have an answer for us.)

So.... that's the short version of how we got here.  Things have gotten so crazy around here,  the entire family breaks it down to "Stomp the House" after dinner every night.  Don't know what I'm talking about? Click here (pay special attention to the rap starting at :40 "Go Go Maria..Oh No No Maria..")

We covet your prayers during this process.  We are currently finalizing our decision as to which agency to use.  If you have adopted in the past, are currently adopting, or know of someone who has, please contact us.  Some of the best information we have gathered to this point has been from others who have been through this process.  

We love you guys and can't wait to see what God has in store for us next.